Hotel fright

'Hotel Flight' serves Surgut's wonderful airport. It's comfy and has more-than-decent WiFi and I look forward to staying there. The restaurant, on the other hand, is something else.

'What would you like?'
'This one'
'We don't have it'
'This one'
'We don't have it'
[etc. etc. ... finally ...]
'What do you have?'
'Pasta, or [something I didn't understand].'
'I'll have that please [the one I didn't understand - pasta sounded a bit plain]'

And then it arrived ...

Monolith: dinner

This homogenous lump of meat-like substance is among the worst meals I've ever had. Tasteless, ambiguous, and tough. I didn't come to Russia for the food; nevertheless this is poor.

The next morning, for breakfast the same script was played, and I started to recall Eddie Izzard's 'cake or death' sketch. The death hadn't gone down too well, so I chose ... pasta.

And then it arrived ... pasta, da solo.

Good morning! I ordered apple juice too - to spice it up a bit. Crazy, I know.

 Off to work then.

New opera house

One of the few buildings that didn't shoot up in a hurry in Astana, the new opera house, recently opened its doors. It's a stunning piece of work, even seen from a little Nokia's point of view. It's set with a generous 'green belt' around it, all the more remarkable given its central location, and it sits on slightly higher ground giving a certain air of superiority (like it or not) and elegance.

The entrance originally sat on a busy road, so to remedy this ghastly juxtaposition, they closed the road, made it 30 feet deeper, and put a cap on it, so that the now the array of neoclassical pillars that constitute the main entrance stand over a large, open raised square.

The square is immaculate and I love the open space and the vistas. To the right is Khan Shatyr, straight ahead is a public park, sculptures and all, and to the left is the city's budding Skyline. Walking around Astana in the Autumn can be a real pleasure.

Pernch

Sometimes you don't want to fully commit to sitting on a bench. Maybe you're not staying long, or maybe there's already someone on it and you don't feel comfortable sharing.

A bench, with a perch. A pernch.

This is where a Pernch comes in handy. Don't worry, it has full bench functionality, but additionally it has a perch on each end - for the non-committal types. Park a buttock or too, and don't feel like you've over-committed. Rest your weary legs, put your bags down, relax.

Big, green, bench.

I can't help but feel that Chris Evans had something to do with this. Either that or the producers of The Big Breakfast have come out of retirement and set up a consultancy on how to make big silly 'fun' things. Obviously Astana was an attractive prospect for them, and they've come here and done some 'out of the box' thinking.

A 'well earned' break.

This must be about as big as a bench can be before we stop calling it a bench. It's so big that not one - and not two! - but three builders are having a 'well earned' break on this bench.

Towers of bable

The two main themes of the Emirates, in my experience, were Islam, which roughly speaking shuns the material world; and rampant materialism and consumerism. The symbol of the latter is the tower.

The exhibition centre. An exhibition in itself.

In addition to Dubai's super tall Burj Khalifa, and a gazzilion other super tall buildings, Abu Dhabi is making an effort too; I've picked a few here to comment on. The exhibition centre caught my attention; it's classically weird and stupid and excessive and impressive and almost elegant.

Air traffic control. With style.

The air traffic control tower is the coolest one I've ever seen. Great job guys.

In downtown Abu Dhabi, there seems to be an effort to make it look like it's teeming with towers. In a great compliment to New York, they seem to have modeled their sky-scape thereafter. It goes to this extent: an individual development often constitutes multiple blocks which are all the same, presumably just so that it looks like there's more towers?

Abu Dhabi. Teeming with towers.

In a place with few people and plenty of space, I can't see any reason to build like this. So there's this great sense of irrationality to the developments, whose priorities are driven by vanity. The finer details are invariably beautiful, and seem to tirelessly promote Islam. The irony doesn't seem apparent to them though.

Shangri-la

We popped to the Shangri-la for a buffet. This is Abu Dhabi, and this is a five star hotel, so as expected everything was opulent and out of proportion. Take the stair case for example.

Lovely, but those big things above the plants are gross. Anyway, behind the stairs was the buffet itself, with food from around the world. Only the butter chicken was really worth noting. Absolutely delicious. Outside were some nice vistas:

Private beach.

A bridge over water which, if it's a citizen of UAE, is not likely to be troubled.

Of particular delight to the eye was the Sheikh's mosque, big, brash, white and beautiful; and for me the epitome of the Emirates: something straight from Aladdin.

Sheikh and not stirred