Salvador Dali

Sunglasses worn in a nightclub: as endearing
in Kazakhstan as anywhere else in the world.

I promised to review one more Night Time Club before Christmas so here it is. I love clubbing.

But first I'd like to say a very big thank you for the 1500+ visits here in the last few months. Taking my mum out of the equation I estimate that at least 10 other people have visited! It's been a real joy for me sharing the ins and outs of life in Astana with you. 

I'll be back in the new year leaving no bench unmentioned and no guide book unscathed.

Salvador Dali: terrible bar service, rip-off drinks, a good cover band who were quickly replaced by a DJ-in-the-spotlight playing mediocre music with as much continuity as a phone call while you drive through the Mont Blanc tunnel.

No chance of usurping Kazbar.

 

Aishat enjoys waiting three hours to be served at the bar.

Blink or you'll miss it

It's getting pretty cold now. I used to make the 100m dash from my apartment to work without my nostrils freezing but now that happens within a few seconds of being outdoors. It's down to -30C these days and I have to keep blinking to avoid my eyelashes freezing together.

Silver fox: I've aged fourty years since arriving here

It takes less than a minute for icicles to form on my eyelids and eyebrows, and my breath lands on my hair and freezes; in the picture above hair that wasn't covered by my hat is frozen and my eyelashes each host an icicle.

Burger Mix vs Sky Bar

We took Doug out to Sky Bar for his birthday; it's only two floors up but its huge panoramic glass wall gives a good view of many of the shiny new tacky towers of Astana.

Despite the impressive scene, the music is deafening and the inevitable gazillion TV screens are also included, half with MTV as usual and the other half with flight times - the bar is relatively near the airport so you could meet there for a goodbye meal before flying off, all the while keeping an eye on your flight.

Silver lining: Burger Mix, next door to the inferior Sky Bar

In fact, that would be a terrible plan because the service is horrifically slow. After waiting the best part of two hours for Jamie's pizza we decided to leave (Jamie was convinced that they'd noticed we were angry but I pointed out that angry British people look just the same as other British people: calm and polite). Even getting the bill was arduous.

In a shade of irony, given that this was a bad service experience, Doug and I enjoyed some fantastic trout, probably the best food I've had in Astana.

The silver lining to this cloud of birthday misery is Burger mix: ten metres away from Sky Bar and sells beers and burgers for a tenth the price of Sky Bar and all served promptly; The burgers came hot and in fresh bread and were delicious. We resolved to hang out at Burger Mix in the future! 

SCATtered all the way to Shymkent

by Nisha Patel

My companions and I took the early evening flight on SCAT to Shymkent, the capital of South Kazakhstan and the third largest city on the Kazakh steppe. On mentioning to my Kazakh colleagues that I was heading to Shymkent, I was met with bemusement. You do know that it’s wild and lawless, don’t you? Why would a single female possibly wish to go there, when she had the shiny shopping malls of Astana on her doorstep? I was intrigued by their description of manic driving and wife stealing; and the thought of being kidnapped, hauled onto horseback and ridden across the steppe, whilst partaking in the traditional horseback kissing game Kuuz Kuu (‘catch the girl) appealed to my romantic side.

Steppe away from the cookie jar

With its unfortunate appellation, SCAT was not a particularly exciting prospect. Concernedly, I recollected the not so delightful in-flight services of Aeroflot to Tokyo, via Moscow. Besides the few horror stories of broken seats, and that oh so unpleasant Soviet service with a smile OR NOT, that I’d heard about, what didn’t instill me with great confidence was the knowledge that SCAT has been identified as having ‘serious safety deficiencies’ by the Aviation Safety Network and banned from flying in EU airspace. Oh well, I’d be scattered across the big blue Kazakh sky. A pleasant surprise then to find smiley air hostesses, a moist edible sandwich (except for the limp lettuce), a considerable choice of beverages, and a smooth landing at Shymkent airport 1hour 20minutes later! I felt we were off to a good start.

Modern bench

A modern bench.

I passed this bench the other day, on the way to see Chris Hoy's muscular tuchas power him home as world cycling champ. It was cold and windy, out on the edge of town where the wind arrives after endless miles of uninterrupted steppe; but I couldn't resist risking frostbite to catch a snap of this modern piece of urban kit. It's a lovely bench: elegant modern arms and - quite sensibly - a wooden seat. Certainly worth a mention.

We've found our Nisha

Nisha

Nietzsche

Niche

They say you have to find your niche in life. Maybe they don't. Who even are they? Anyway, I'm very excited to announce a new contributor to the blog. Yes, a new contributor!

Please give a very warm welcome to Nisha, not a nineteenth century German philosopher with a very large moustache, but a twenty first century super-heroine who will be travelling the width and breadth of Astana and indeed the great country of Kazakhstan to bring you something a so-called 'guide book' couldn't dream of: an actual feel for this place, the nitty gritty, those everday little things that make a big difference.

Nisha, I'm very excited you'll be writing on the blog, fire away!